“We’ll keep it simple.”
That was the plan. Said confidently. Repeated often. Believed, at least in the beginning.
We are celebrating our daughter’s marriage sometime early next year. It’s a love marriage. The groom is a traditional Kannadiga, we are Maharashtrians, and both of them settled in the US. He works in AI, she’s a doctor. Sensible children, practical careers, clear thinking.
Naturally, we assumed the wedding would follow the same logic.
This will also be the first wedding in both families. Which means there is enthusiasm. There are opinions. And there is a quiet but firm expectation that “it should be done properly.”
The Fusion Wedding Plan
The blueprint looked neat on paper.
Just the essentials:
- Mehendi
- Sangeet
- The wedding ceremony culminating into a reception
Close friends and family only. No extravaganza. No unnecessary show.
Like many modern “fusion weddings,” ours borrows the lively North Indian-style sangeet while staying true to the traditional South Indian muhurtam. It sounds beautifully balanced until you begin planning the logistics around it.
Very quickly, we discovered that “just” is a dangerous word in Indian weddings.
Each event brings with it a series of decisions. Venue, guest list, décor, timing, outfits, food. Every decision quietly multiplies into ten smaller ones.
For the bride’s and groom’s families, this adds another layer to venue planning. The venue cannot be too far from the airport for guests arriving from the “other state”. Travel time matters. Hotel proximity matters. Even the accessibility at the venue for elders becomes an operational consideration.
Venue Hunting: Where Simplicity Gets Tested
We started visiting venues with a clear goal: something elegant but not excessive.
Our reference points didn’t help.
We’ve attended destination weddings in Udaipur where the setting itself feels like a movie set. We’ve also been to intimate weddings in Bangalore during COVID, where 75-100 guests and a simple mandap created a completely different kind of warmth. And then there are the large reception events with guest lists that look like electoral rolls.
Armed with all this experience, we walked into venues saying, “We want something small.”
Every venue nodded politely and showed us photos of events with 300 people, minimum billing bench marks and what not…
Packages have interesting names. “Intimate Royal.” “Minimal Heritage.” “Classic Premium.” Each one comes with a per-plate cost that requires a moment of silence before responding.
You start with a budget in mind. The venue team gently explains why that budget is… optimistic.
We are still looking. Slightly wiser, slightly more flexible.
Outfit Shopping: A Lesson in Fabric Economics
Then came outfit shopping.This deserves its own chapter.
We visited stores where outfits start at ₹1.8 lakh and go up in a calm, confident manner. We also found beautiful options at ₹18,000 that honestly felt just as satisfying.
The experience is fascinating. In one store, you are told, “This is a timeless piece.” In another, “This is very practical.” In both cases, the outfit looks lovely.
Somewhere along the way, you start noticing the language:
- Handcrafted
- Heritage weave
- Subtle work
- Statement piece
We’ve learned to nod thoughtfully.
There’s also a moment when you look at two outfits and genuinely cannot tell why one costs ten times more than the other. That’s when you realize this is not just shopping. This is education.
We now understand fabric, embroidery, and pricing at a level we never expected. Thankfully, some of our friends who have gone through this jamboree chipped in to introduce us to bridal designers who are happy to understand your tastes and then suggest something that they will put together to make it uniquely yours.
Two Cultures, One Ceremony
Then comes the more meaningful part. Bringing together two traditions.
Maharashtrian on one side. Kannadiga on the other.
The conversations are gentle and often quite interesting.
“In our custom, we do this.”
“Oh, in ours, we don’t have that, but we do this instead.”
There is no conflict, just comparison. And occasionally, curiosity.
Some rituals overlap. Some don’t. Some are adapted. Some are kept exactly as they are.
What becomes clear is that the wedding is not about choosing one side over the other. It’s about making space for both.
Fusion Food
If there’s one thing guests remember long after the wedding, it’s not who wore what, but what was served on their plate.
With a Maharashtrian bride and a Kannadiga groom, the menu too deserves to be a fusion. We are hoping to blend the best of both culinary traditions and give our guests something they’ll remember for all the right reasons.
One pleasant surprise has been Bengaluru’s flexibility. Unlike many venues in Mumbai, where you’re expected to choose from a panel of approved caterers and decorators, venues here let you bring in professionals of your own choice. We’re hoping that this freedom helps us create a menu that celebrates not just two families, but two states, one delicious dish at a time.
The Guest List: A Quiet Challenge
We had decided early on. Close friends and family only.
Simple.Until you start writing names. There are different categories that emerge:
- Must invite for all the 3 the events
- Should invite for at least 2 of the events
- It will be awkward if we don’t invite
Every name has a story attached. A relationship. A history.
You want to keep things small. You also don’t want to hurt anyone.
So the list grows. Then it shrinks. Then it grows again.
We are still working on it.
A Glimpse into the Wedding Industry
One unexpected takeaway from all this has been understanding the sheer scale of the wedding industry in India. The wedding industry ecosystem calls for a blog of its own.
There is something for everyone.From highly curated designer experiences to simple, well-executed events. From extravagant décor to minimal setups that still feel complete.
It’s an entire ecosystem that adapts to your budget, your taste, and sometimes even your confusion.
You walk in thinking you know what you want. You walk out realizing there are many versions of what you want.
What Actually Matters
Somewhere between venue visits and outfit trials, a quieter thought starts to settle in.
This is not just an event. It’s two families meeting. It’s two individuals starting a life together, far from home. It’s a moment that will be remembered long after the details fade.
The scale of the wedding matters less than the feeling it creates.
Still Planning, Still Smiling
With the kids away in the USA, we, the parents, are in the middle of a long-distance planning marathon.
There are venues to shortlist, bookings to finalize, logistics to coordinate and guest lists to review repeatedly. In a remarkable display of confidence, the bride and groom have delegated the most critical decisions entirely to the parents while participating enthusiastically in occasional calls from different time zones.
One realisation for us – simplicity involves handling behind the scenes complexity so well that in the end it should look simple to the guests. Hoping that with all the efforts being put in, the wedding does turn out, at least for the guests, to be as “simple” as we first imagined. More than that we are keen to be able to convey the warmth, meaningfulness of both families to everyone who has been invited.
At least, that’s the plan.
Keeping fingers crossed !
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